This is the latest milestone on the odd journey of Machete, with the first artwork to the sequel (of the two planned further films) to the ridiculously over the top 2010 Grindhousesque revenge thriller.

While the first film showed that the first film made for a great trailer it’s a little surprising that Robert Rodriguez has two more films in the series in his future, not least the final installment which, while not greenlit as of yet, will exist in trailer form with this new film and is called Machete Kills Again…In Space! Of course he does, but the plot synopsis for this film involves a weapon being launched into space so there’s an obvious way in there.

Machete Kills will be filming in the Spring and no doubt will include the same bevy of odd cameos and bloodsplatter.

Here’s the picture, all the way from Coming Soon, click it to make a big scary face on your computer,

The US Library of Congress maintains the National Film Registry, into which is admitted any film considered to be culturally, historically or aesthetically significant. Despite those criteria being very much in the eye of the beholder, few would question the wisdom of the decision to add Jonathan Demme’s imperious 1990 chiller, The Silence of the Lambs, to the Registry.

25 new additions have been made, including somewhat obvious choices such as Forrest Gump and welcome left-field inclusions like Robert Rodriguez’s debut El Mariachi. James H Billington, who has been librarian of the Library of Congress for the best part of quarter of a century, had this to say:-

“These films are selected because of their enduring significance to American culture. Our film heritage must be protected because these cinematic treasures document our history and culture and reflect our hopes and dreams.”

Critically lauded and adored by film-fans, The Silence of the Lambs is an absolute gem of a film, menacing, atmospheric, disturbing and compelling. But does it belong in a treasury of culturally or historically significant films? So far, Forrest Gump is the newest film to be included, but are there other more recent films that deserve to be added, or are there films already added that have no place there? You can see 2011′s new additions here and the full list of films in the archive here. Please feel free to comment below.

Source: BBC Entertainment.

Honestly, if we had a nickel for every false-start Sin City 2 story we ran, we’d have…..five nickels. Anyway, with news that William Monaghan is now on board to get the script finished, we can only hope that the speculated shooting period of early 2012 will not prove to be another false dawn. Frank Miller gave more reassurance by discussing with MTV recently a bit more information about the stories that seem likely to find their way into the latest set of overlapping episodes.

A Dame to Kill For seems set to be the main story, which involves characters such as Gail, Miho and Manute (which may therefore see Michael Clarke Duncan and Rosario Dawson back on set), as well as Clive Owen’s Dwight. Further stories will also be involved, one featuring Jessica Alba’s Nancy (rescued by Bruce Willis from the mildly jaundiced Nick Stahl in That Yellow Bastard in the first film), in an effort to provide a through-line for audiences. To be honest, the world of Sin City is so stylish, so evocative, that it may not matter a great deal if anyone returns from the first film. It seems likely that the sequel will “work” regardless.

Miler says that “Just Another Saturday Night” will also be included, which might bring back Mickey Rourke’s Marv. A welcome addition to the film, though Mickey Rourke seems non-committal to say the least, having been quoted a few years ago as saying:-

“No, I’m not interested in that right now. That’s not a reality right now. It’s pissing in the wind. There’s different factions going different directions there. I don’t know. That’s three hours of make up and I’m claustrophobic, so I’m going to have to work something out”

But a few years is a long time and he may change his mind if the script is right and Robert Rodriguez does indeed return to direct. Frank Miller’s exact words to MTV were:-

“Sin City number two is primarily an adaptation of the book ‘A Dame to Kill For’. It also features the short story, ‘Just Another Saturday Night’ and two new stories. One involving Jessica Alba‘s character, Nancy Callahan, that I came up with for the movie in order to tie things together and make it be more united with the first.”

So there you go. Rodriguez won’t commit until he’s seen the script and is sure it is up to snuff, so as ever, we’ll see.

Source: IndieWire and MTV.

Ahead of Halloween, Lions Gate Home Entertainment have given us classic 1996 horror movie, From Dusk Till Dawn to give away to three lucky winners. The movie is available to buy now but we want to give you the chance to win one! The film stars Harvey Keitel, George Clooney, Juliette Lewis, Quentin Tarantino, Ernest Liu and is directed by Robert Rodriguez.

Now in high definition; From the creators of Pulp Fiction and Desperado (Quentin Tarantino & Robert Rodriguez) comes From Dusk Till Dawn, a wild and wicked action thriller. A deranged convict, along with his fast-talking brother, kidnap a preacher and his two kids, and flee for the safety of a remote nightclub in Mexico. But once they arrive, they discover that the club is anything but a safe haven for criminals. Its bloodthirsty clientele forces the brothers to team up with their hostages in order to escape alive. Hilarious dialogue and outrageous plot twists make From Dusk Till Dawn a wildly entertaining thrill ride for audiences everywhere.

To be in with a chance of winning the movie, simply answer the following question using the form below:

Who directed the movie, From Dusk Till Dawn?

COMPETITION NOW CLOSED

The small print:

• Open to UK residents only
• Only one entry per household will be counted
• The competition will close 31st October at 23.59 GMT
• The winner will be picked at random from entries received
• No cash alternative is available

The usual T&Cs can be found here. Good Luck!

Ahead of Halloween, Lions Gate Home Entertainment have given us classic horror movie, The Faculty to give away to three lucky winners. The movie is available to buy now but we want to give you the chance to win one! The film starred Jordana Brewster, Josh Hartnett, Clea DuVall, Laura Harrisd is directed by the awesome Robert Rodriguez.

Classic horror now in high definition: When some very creepy things start happening around school, the kids at Herrington High make a chilling discovery that confirms their worst suspicions: their teachers really are from another planet! As mind-controlling parasites rapidly begin spreading from the faculty to the students’ bodies, it’s ultimately up to the few who are left – an unlikely collection of loners, leaders, nerds and jocks – to save the world from alien domination!

To be in with a chance of winning the movie, simply answer the following question using the form below:

Who directed the movie, The Faculty?

COMPETITION NOW CLOSED

The small print:

• Open to UK residents only
• Only one entry per household will be counted
• The competition will close 31st October at 23.59 GMT
• The winner will be picked at random from entries received
• No cash alternative is available

The usual T&Cs can be found here. Good Luck!

Goodness me, the development of Sin City 2 has been going on forever. There was a time when its entry on IMDb showed “In Production” for a 2010 release, which I think we can all now agree is unrealistic.

At Comic-Con in July, Rodriguez said that funding was in place and that shooting would begin once the cast and script were locked down. Miller has apparently sorted out the first draft of the script and no less impressive a writer than William Monahan, Oscar-winner for The Departed has now been drafted in to work on it further.

There is plenty of Sin City material to populate another film, whether utilising further stories for previous characters (like Mickey Rourke’s Marv), or bringing in hitherto unexplored strands. Hopefully this won’t be another false dawn and we can get back to Sin City some time soon. Monahan is said to be reuniting with Scorsese for a remake of 1974′s The Gambler and has also scripted Oblivion, a hot-hot-hot sci-fi project to which Tom Cruise is now attached, but he should be able to find ample time to have a bit of a tweak with Sin City.

Thanks to THR for the heads up on his one.

One-man film studio Robert Rodriguez is currently doing the promo rounds for the forth instalment of his Spy Kids series (really Robert, really?) and had this to say to We Got This Covered about work on his long-awaited sequel to the adaptation of the famed Frank Miller graphic novel series, and the follow-up to his Grindhouse-inspired effort from last year:

“ Sin City 2 is going good, we’re just finishing the script for that, we already got the money. We have everything we need so we can just start shooting as soon as we get the pages. And it’s the same thing for Machete 2. We’ve already got the budget, just waiting for the script. As soon as we’re finished writing we get to start the shoot.”

All this really begs the question, is Rodriguez planning on shooting anything in the near future which isn’t based on any of his past projects?

One thing which can be said about the director is that he isn’t adverse to wheeling out interesting gimmicks and marketing ploys to try and inject new life into those rehashes. The third Spy Kids film used 3D many years before James Cameron unleashed it on the cinema-going population, and Spy Kids: All The Time In The World is billed as being filmed in “4D Aromascope” (essentially, that old-school process which allows people to smell odors and aromas from the film via scratch & sniff cards).

Fans who were hoping the director might embark on something fresh and new, may groan at this news, but the fact is he’s a sound investment for Hollywood. This new Spy Kids adventure (which, incidentally, features the voice of Ricky Gervias as a talking dog) was made for the relatively smallish sum of $40 million (particularly restrained for a forth film in a popular series) and his next two sequels will undoubtedly follow a similar, modest budgetary path.

So its good news for the cost conscious studios and bad news for those out there who are still waiting on Rodriguez to fulfil his prophesy of being the man to revolutionise the film industry. Or maybe he has already?

At this years San Diego Comic-Con event, visionary director Robert Rodriguez revealed plans, and some interesting concept art (which you can see at the bottom of the page), for a live-action adaptation of Frank Fazetta‘s Fire and Ice.

Inspired by the animation film released in 1983, a unique collaboration between Fazetta and Ralph Bakshi, Rodriguez plans to bring his own brand of filmmaking to a live-action reinvention of the production.

Speaking to Entertainment Weekly, Rodriguez said, “I want it to look like you just stepped into one of his paintings, where you get to see his world, and how he saw people, anatomy, and composition and color. It will feel like it’s real, but not real. It’ll be his reality. He saw things differently. He painted from his imagination. He didn’t take a photograph and just paint it.”

The films plot is summarised below:

From his stronghold in Ice Peak, the evil Nekron sends forth a wave of deadly glaciers, forcing humanity to retreat to Fire Keep, a kingdom ruled by a generous king. When King Jarol’s daughter Teegra is kidnapped, young warrior Larn teams with the mysterious and legendary Dark Wolf, to rescue the princess and the realm from Nekron’s evil sorcery.

Source: Entertainment Weekly via SuperHeroHype

Robert Rodriguez has been in San Diego promoting his new production company, Quick Draw Productions, and two of the things he’s looking to make are the follow-up to Sin City and the two sequels that would make a Machete trilogy, THR report.

The brilliant writer, director, producer, and all-round talented filmmaker has been talking about a Sin City sequel for a while now, and with his new production company starting up, we can hopefully look forward to this much sooner rather than later.

He’s announced that his new company will be partnering with AMD Austin, a hardware company he’s long been working with, whose technology he says,

“force him to stretch creatively to meet the new possibilities.”

It’s almost always good news to hear directors trying to stretch themselves, especially with as talented a director as Rodriguez, and this is definitely good news when it includes his vision for Sin City 2. Rodriguez says that he and Frank Miller will be co-directing the sequel as they did the first film, and that Miller is finishing up the screenplay now,

“which has reverted back to the trio-of-storylines approach of the first movie—“A Dame to Kill For” plus two new stories Miller has devised. Many of the characters from the first film would reappear, and Rodriguez says he doesn’t see scheduling as a problem since in the last one the green screen allowed him to shoot actors in the same scene as much as eight months apart. No one has yet been cast, though the writer-director claims they could shoot it soon and quickly, as early as the fall.”

Though it’s still pretty early days yet, I’m remaining optimistic because Rodriguez sounds optimistic. With his own production company granting him more control of what he wants to make, it could well mean that he and Miller will be able to start filming as and when he sees fit after Miller finishes the script.

Rodriguez also says that the sequel will be in 3D. And whilst that might cause a bit of a sigh for many, the director thinks that the technology will only serve to make the film that much better, saying that it will,

“really enhance the CG-noir landscapes the content uses (the actors are filmed against green screen).”

I think the man is talented enough a filmmaker for people who aren’t that fond of 3D films to grant him more than a bit of trust to bring us an awesome sequel, and if shooting really does begin as early as autumn, then we might well be able to look forward to a second Sin City before long.

Coming next from the writer-director-producer is the fourth Spy Kids film, Spy Kids: All the Time in the World in 4D, which stars frequent collaborators Antonio Banderas, Jessica Alba, and Danny Trejo. And with the new film introducing a new set of kids, if the fourth succeeds, Rodriguez admits that more films in the series could be on the way.

Trejo and Alba most recently worked with Rodriguez on last year’s Machete, and Rodriguez also has sequels in development for that too. The first of two planned sequels has already been written, and hopefully it won’t be long for them to go into production either. Obviously, with Rodriguez helming all of these projects, they can’t really all be done at the same time. But he’s known for firing on all cylinders, non-stop, so expect big things to come from him and Quick Draw Productions over the next few years.

Fans of Robert Rodriguez’s James Bond for Kids series will yelp with excitement at this new trailer for the latest installment for Spy Kids: All The Time in the World.

New blood is awash in this fourth film, which I assume is a reboot of sorts to kick the series up the franchise and spawn another two films, and Jessica Alba looks at home in her role as StepMom/Secret Agent, certainly her presence will delight half of the adult audience taking their kids to see the film.

It’s standard stuff, but Rodriguez knows exactly what he’s doing with the premise of giving kids enormous weapons and very fast cars to run riot with and its right up with the most engaging of wish-fulfillment.

And there’s Ricky Gervais voicing a dog. So, a few laughs, lots of blowing up and a bit with a dog. Henslowe would have been proud.

On the surface, Marissa Cortez Wilson (Jessica Alba) has it all…married to a famous spy hunting television reporter, a new baby and intelligent twin step kids.  But in reality, trying to mother Rebecca (Rowan Blanchard) and Cecil (Mason Cook), who clearly don’t want her around, is her toughest challenge yet.  Also, her husband, Wilbur (Joel McHale), wouldn’t know a spy if he lived with one which is exactly the case – Marissa’s a retired secret agent.

Marissa’s world is turned upside down when the maniacal Timekeeper (Jeremy Piven) threatens to take over the planet and she’s called back into action by the head of OSS, home of the greatest spies and where the now-defunct Spy Kids division was created.  With Armageddon quickly approaching, Rebecca and Cecil are thrust into action when they learn their boring stepmom was once a top agent and now the world’s most competitive ten year olds are forced to put their bickering aside and rely on their wits.  With a little help from a couple of very familiar Spy Kids, Carmen (Alexa Vega) and Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara), and some mind-blowing gadgets, they just may be able to save the world and possibly bring their family together while they’re at it.

Spy Kids: All the Time in the World hits UK & US cinemas 19th August.

Although most would say that director Robert Rodriguez tends to be at his best when catering for an adult audience (taking Sin City and Desperado in preference to Shark Boy & Lava Girl or Spy Kids), his Spy Kids series has shown surprising longevity, churning good, honest, fun entertainment and turning a healthy profit against modest operating budgets.

Spy Kids 4 is his latest offering, with Jessica Alba and Jeremy Piven joining the usual returning cast members and the ubiquitous Danny Trejo. In this latest publicity still, we see Alba in a somewhat peculiar fingerless gloves/black leotard combo and Piven looking for all the world like something out of Dick Tracy or Bugsy Malone. Since the storyline involves a villain bent on stopping time, no doubt Piven’s conspicuous time-piece and anachronistic wardrobe are all very much required.

You can catch our earlier article with a different still of Alba and a plot synopsis right here. We’ll find out at the end of August whether Rodriguez is bringing us more of the same or something a little fresher.

Source: IGN.

MTV have released a nice new batch of images of upcoming movies this summer and we’ll show you each one in a series of posts over the next few days.

Title: Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World

Director: Robert Rodriguez

Cast: Jessica Alba, Sadie Brook, Roger Edwards, Adam Moroz, Alcides Dias, Danny Trejo, Antonio Banderas, Jeremy Piven

Synopsis: On the surface, Marissa Cortez Wilson (Jessica Alba) has it all…married to a famous spy hunting television reporter, a new baby and intelligent twin step kids. But in reality, trying to mother Rebecca (Rowan Blanchard) and Cecil (Mason Cook), who clearly dont want her around, is her toughest challenge yet. Also, her husband, Wilbur (Joel McHale), wouldnt know a spy if he lived with one, which is exactly the case – Marissa’s a retired secret agent.

Marissa’s world is turned upside down when the maniacal Timekeeper (Jeremy Piven) threatens to take over the planet and she’s called back into action by the head of OSS, home of the greatest spies and where the now-defunct Spy Kids division was created. With Armageddon quickly approaching, Rebecca and Cecil are thrust into action when they learn their boring stepmom was once a top agent… now the worlds most competitive ten year olds are forced to put their bickering aside and rely on their wits. With a little help from a couple of very familiar Spy Kids, Carmen (Alexa Vega) and Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara), and some mind-blowing gadgets, they just may be able to save the world and possibly bring their family together while they’re at it.

UK Release date: 19th August

Trailer: Coming Soon

Hobo with a Shotgun is a feature-length adaptation of the highly successful fake trailer made for Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez’ Grindhouse, and stars Rutger Hauer, Pasha Ebrahimi, Robb Wells and Molly Dunsworth.

The film centres on a homeless vigilante, Hobo (Hauer), who finds himself trapped in urban chaos. He is surrounded by armed robbers, corrupt cops and even a paedophile Santa. Hobo decides to bring about justice the best way he knows how – with his trusty pump-action shotgun.

Screenwriter John Davies litters the film with throwbacks to 1970′s horror, while conserving a gleeful level of originality and satirical humour into the oft-told one-against-the-world tale. It does wonders to keep viewers on the edge of their seats, and thoroughly entertained throughout. While the premise is a tad sketchy, the scenarios that derive from it – murderous dodgems, a torturous pinata, and the aforementioned unorthodox Santa – certainly aren’t.

Jason Eisener, who opts for practical effects over digital CGI, manages to balance a realistic feel with over-the-top, cartoonish, and incredibly gory violence. He indulges in frenetic cinematography, glorified lighting and a stomping soundtrack to boot, all in keeping with the exploitation genre and the films to which he is paying homage.

The choice to recast Hauer as the Hobo was one of utter genius, and he plays it with effectively straight assurance, keeping the film grounded amidst the hysteria. The supporting cast, a smorgasbord of unknowns and ex-TV stars, helps further to instil and sustain the feel of an authentic exploitation flick – something that previous studios’ efforts have failed to capitalise on.

Dunsworth – a prostitute and Hobo’s unimaginable foil, Abby – stands out amongst the supporting cast. She does tremendously well with a severely underwritten character, providing a brilliant antithesis to Hobo’s ruthlessness. They have a sizzling chemistry on-screen, and a subversive, darkly amusing rapport that feels extremely gratifying.

It’s clear Eisener has an eye for the schlock genre and, by letting his imagination run wild, Hobo with a Shotgun emerges as a sure-to-be perennial, shockingly violent and wonderfully clever yet purposely screwball modern-day vigilante thriller. It’s “bloody” terrific fun.

Hobo with a Shotgun will be released in the UK on July 22, 2011.

****½ (4.5/5)

Dimension Films have released the first official image which shows Jessica Alba on the set of the fourth movie in the Spy Kids franchise known as Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World. The movie is directed by Robert Rodriguez and also stars Sadie Brook, Roger Edwards, Adam Moroz, Alcides Dias, Danny Trejo, Antonio Banderas and Jeremy Piven. As you can see from the image, she seems to have her hands full with a possible kid who is a spy?!

Synopsis: On the surface, Marissa Cortez Wilson (Jessica Alba) has it all…married to a famous spy hunting television reporter, a new baby and intelligent twin step kids. But in reality, trying to mother Rebecca (Rowan Blanchard) and Cecil (Mason Cook), who clearly don’t want her around, is her toughest challenge yet. Also, her husband, Wilbur (Joel McHale), wouldn’t know a spy if he lived with one which is exactly the case – Marissa’s a retired secret agent.

Marissa’s world is turned upside down when the maniacal Timekeeper (Jeremy Piven) threatens to take over the planet and she’s called back into action by the head of OSS, home of the greatest spies and where the now-defunct Spy Kids division was created. With Armageddon quickly approaching, Rebecca and Cecil are thrust into action when they learn their boring stepmom was once a top agent and now the world’s most competitive ten year olds are forced to put their bickering aside and rely on their wits. With a little help from a couple of very familiar Spy Kids, Carmen (Alexa Vega) and Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara), and some mind-blowing gadgets, they just may be able to save the world and possibly bring their family together while they’re at it.

Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World is released in the UK & US 19th August.

Thanks to Coming Soon for sharing this one.

Movies that know exactly what they are and what their strengths are endear themselves to me, and the unashamedly raucous and silly Drive Angry (or Drive Angry 3D as it is officially titled) has a highly entertaining B movie heart wrapped in ‘A’ budget and 3D clothes. Reveling in its greasy ’70s occult and road movie exploitation roots, without slavishly recreating them in the manner of Tarantino’s and Rodriguez’s Grindhouse, Drive Angry is a wonderfully schlocky ride that never takes itself seriously.

Milton (Nicolas Cage) has escaped from hell to save his granddaughter from the clutches of a hillbilly satanic cult, led by the messianic Jonah King (Twilight‘s Billy Burke, coming on like the bastard love child of Billy Bob Thornton and Timothy Olyphant, if that makes any sense). Needing a lift to his destination, Milton hooks up with gorgeous coffee shop waitress Piper (Amber Heard), who conveniently both quits her job and is in possession of her boyfriend’s equally gorgeous ’69 Dodge Charger. The douchebag boyfriend quickly dispatched with, Piper and Milton set off to track the Satanists down, with Hell’s emissary The Accountant (William Fichtner) and various law enforcement types (Milton was a very bad man when he walked the earth, and it seems a lot of people haven’t forgotten) in hot pursuit.

Cage dutifully serves up his quarterly helping of Cage-ian pissed off middle aged guy, and while he doesn’t approach the perfection that he achieved in last year’s Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, his schtick is perfectly situated in this slice of B movie hokum. Amber Heard supplies the requisite eye candy, but thankfully she and Milton are just pals as Cage is a tad old at this point for her to be believably besotted with him (is Hollywood FINALLY lightening up on its unwavering dedication to perpetuating the aging leading man and a 25-30 years younger love interest rule?). Heard’s Piper is under-written, and she’s too physically slight to be entirely believable as a tough cookie, but no matter. Heard plays well off Cage’s Milton, functioning as a serviceable straight (wo)man riding shotgun through the mayhem (with nary a hair out of place or a make-up smear to be seen).

The film really belongs to co-stars William Fichtner and the array of beautiful muscle cars though. From Fichtner’s first appearance dressed in a pristine white shirt and sombre black suit and tie, he dominates every scene he’s in, dispensing deadpan bon mots and beat downs in equal measure.  The Accountant could easily be spun off into his own vehicle (a cable series perhaps), giving this very capable actor the sort of starring role he clearly deserves. It’s a great part and Fichtner relishes every minute of it, as we do watching him.

Drive Angry foregrounds 3D in a gimmicky and gleeful way that is reminiscent of its original flowering in the 1950s and brief resurgence in the 1980s. As a non-fan of 3D’s current proliferation in live action features, I went into the screening expecting to be annoyed by the use of the format but hoping that the film’s content would overcome my antipathy. The opening scenes quickly waylaid my 3Disgruntlement, announcing in a shower of blood ‘n’ bullets that the filmmakers were utilising the technology for laughs, not misguided notions of realism or an ‘enhanced’ story telling experience a la James Cameron. Thus, one happily delights in flaming bullets exiting gun barrels, beautiful American muscle cars roaring out of the screen, body parts flying about, and even a splintered baseball bat pinning a body to a wall. This is the only way that 3D is at all satisfying for me: highlighted in a way that is obvious and amusing, and used in an unpretentious, goofy genre film like this one, which delivers exactly what the label promises. Nic Cage drives. And he’s REALLY angry.

***~~ (3/5)

After a long and protracted development period (which included a version Robert Rodriguez was due to produce with partner Rose McGowan a couple of years back) could a remake of Red Sonja finally be on the cards?

The company behind the upcoming Conan reboot, Nu Image, appear to finally have a time pencilled in and producer Avi Lerner had this to say to Empire when quizzed:

“We will definitely shoot Red Sonja in between Conan and Conan 2. We already chose the director: an English guy called Simon West.”

West is currently in pre-production on the Nicolas Cage action pic The Medallion, so presumably, this would all start coming together after he’s finished on that project. With a director locked, who is the studio looking at to fill the shoes of 80’s Danish model-turned-actress-turned-celebrity houseguest Brigitte Nielsen? None other than Amber Heard apparently, although it may be wise if someone actually informed her of this.

“Amber is the new Red Sonja… but she doesn’t know it yet! When you write it she’ll get the shock of her life! She’ll call me and say ‘How dare you talk to Empire before you talk to me?!’”

The studio has just finished working with the actress on Drive Angry (which stars the ubiquitous Nicholas Cage) so maybe she won’t take much coaxing to slip into the loincloth and weld a big-ass sword.

We’ll keep you updated if and when she signs on the dotted line.

Guitarist, martial artist, conservationist, writer, producer, animal rights activist and all-round renaissance man Steven Seagal is back in the land of direct-to-video, following his first foray onto the big screen in nearly a decade playing (and rather enjoying himself in the process) the main villain in Robert Rodriguez’s recent feature, Machete.

The film in question is Deadly Crossing – a title with two words which could easily be interchangeable with any of Seagal’s previous features and still fail to offer even a remote clue as to their actual content.

The opening credits instantly bring to mind a US cop TV show, and this is indeed a feature-length episode of a new series called Southern Justice, which has presumably been repackaged as a stand alone film to make a quid or two before the series debuts on a digital channel sometime next year.

It completely rips off those small screen CSI-style programmes too, with it’s reliance on hand-held camera work, flash jump cuts, Dutch angle close-ups and grainy-looking flashbacks, but all these visual tricks add no value whatsoever to proceedings. The majority of these scenes take place at night or in dimly-lit hallways, seemingly to camouflage Seagal’s huge girth and help distract from his perfectly sculptured woollen Ming the Merciless-esque widow’s peak hairpiece.

Seagal is no lone warrior this time around however, as he leads (in the CSI  wise mentor role) a crack unit of plainclothes police to bust Seattle’s drug trade wide open. In terms of plot, that’s pretty much it. Thankfully, the makers have drafted in a two catwalk versions of Cagney & Lacey – sassy broads who have to contend with the day-to-day challenges of sexual discrimination and harassment (which the Seattle police force appear to condone), before winning the respect and approval of their peers. Way to go gals!

For seemingly no reason, the narrative jumps back to the previous 48 hours, mid-film. Was this a script quirk or achieved during post-production when the editor panicked and decided that something was needed to bring viewers out of a state of inertia?

The list goes on and on, but in all honesty, the audience who enjoy this type of movie are unlikely to be concerned about issues like a disjoined narrative or non-existent character arcs. Ultimately, being overly critical towards a DVT Steven Seagal feature is akin to moaning that contestants on the X-Factor don’t meet the required number of octaves to achieve a perfect vocal delivery.

Everyone who has ever seen a film by the tubby ass-kicking one will know exactly what to expect, and fans will be more than satisfied, even though the days when he could physically keep up with the bad guys are long gone, as he now has to resort to popping back behind the wheel of his 4X4 to keep pace.

If anyone does decide to rent this film as a fun Saturday evening distraction (make sure you purchase more than a couple of beers to watch it with, however), in case you were wondering, that is Seagal singing over the opening credits.

**~~~ (2/5)

Robert Rodriguez regular and ex-Folsom prison inmate Danny Trejo (whose lived-in face looks as leathery as his character’s trademark waistcoat) plays the man with the big blades in Tex Mex revenge flick Machete, the director’s return to the big screen following his failed commercial attempt at recreating the Grindhouse experience for a modern audience, and below-par kids effort, Shorts.

We’re in familiar Rodriguez territory here in this tale of an ex-Federale known as Machete who launches a violent campaign of retribution against his former bosses when they brutally murder his wife and leave him for dead. Hired by some unsavoury types to assassinate a senator, he soon realises he’s been set up again and is a cipher involved in the underhanded campaign of a corrupt senator to rid the US of illegal immigrants from the southern border.

An injured Machete escapes the clutches of his enemies (in the film’s most ridiculously over-the-top scene) and enlists the help of a taco street vendor-cum-revolutionary (Michelle Rodriquez) and a sympathetic border patrol agent (Jessica Alba) to help unearth the conspiracy and bring those who have wronged him to justice, or alternatively, attempt to carve them up into human kebabs-sized slices instead.

Rodriguez is actually credited as co-director (he shares the position with long-time assistant editor Ethan Maniquis) although there’s very little evidence here to suggest another filmmaker’s fingerprints on the finished film. This is a shame as the film itself could have done with a fresh approach. Where the likes of Desperado and Dusk Till Dawn were put together with a real sense of fun and inventiveness, Machete feels like Rodriguez is just going through the motions.

For the most part, there’s an unwelcome sense of déjà vu here, and the director’s usual trademarks (the slow-mo fades, the mixture of guns and religious iconography, pounding Mexican rock score) all seem a little tired and worn out this time around. Even the added socio-political subplot and fun Paul Verhoven-esque satirical commercials sprinkled throughout aren’t enough to inject new life into an overly-familiar narrative, which isn’t helped by a slack and uneven pace.

Even the majority of the colourful list of supporting actors fail to make much of an impression. Jeff Fahey is a welcome addition and (rather surprisingly) fellow villain Steven Seagal (wearing what looks to be a bad Pocahontas-type wig and a brown, loose-fitted brown khaki military jacket/maturity gown) gives the most relaxed and fun performance of his career to date, although when you have an overweight, DTV superstar providing a more memorable turn than that of Robert DeNiro (given very little to do here as the gun-tooting senator) you know that something is amiss. Lindsay Lohan looks suitably scuzzy in her role of Fahey’s slutty daughter, but it does make you wonder if she even avoided the make-up trailer all together and just found her own way to the set after a heavy night on the tiles.

Trejo (who has been a regular and welcomed fixture in Rodriguez’s films since 1995’s Desperado) asserts himself quite well in his first lead performance, but he isn’t given much to do and he’s playing a character, the likes of which we’ve seen different variations of in the director’s work numerous times before.

For all its failings, the film does occasionally come alive, and a superbly-staged church shoot-out sequence with Cheech Marin as a gun-tooting padre (set to a rendition of Ave Maria on the soundtrack), plus a effectively nasty slice and dice pre-credit sequence hint at what could have been. The opening truly looks like it has been unearthed in some kind of vault for unseen 70’s exploitation features (further enhanced by the faked distressed film look). This fun visual device soon disappears (much like it did in Grindhouse), and it also seems to take with it the entertaining and sleazy quality which the film could have greatly benefited from.

Although hardened fans may feel that the director has delivered exactly what they were looking for, if you’re expecting a film which pays homage to the genre it’s originated from, yet at the same time, still retains a unique vision (which Death Proof almost managed to do), this is not it. Rodriguez has the resources at his disposal to basically make whatever he wants and Sin City proved that he can still deliver the goods on both a visual and visceral level. Machete feels like a step backwards for a filmmaker who is capable of so much more.

For a film which famously started life as a fake, Gridhouse-esque trailer, maybe it should have stayed in that fun format (with audiences having to use their imaginations to fill in the gaps) instead of striving for feature-length legitimacy.

Sony Pictures Entertainment and Hyde Park International have released a brand new, previously unseen, UK trailer for Machete.

Machete, an expansion of a fake trailer released with Grindhouse in 2007, is co-directed by Robert Rodriguez and Ethan Maniquis.

The film stars Danny Trejo, Robert De Niro, Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Alba, Don Johnson, Michelle Rodriguez and Steven Seagal.

After being betrayed by the organization who hired him, an ex-Federale (Trejo) launches a brutal rampage of revenge against his former boss.

Machete will be released in cinemas across the UK and Ireland on November 26.

Watch the trailer below:

Forgive me for the delay in getting this post done, it’s been on the list for the last week! A few new images have been taken from the set of Robert Rodriguez’ new movie, Spy Kids 4: All the Time in the World with the subject in question is Jessica Alba.

I was fortunate enough to go to Troublemaker Studios a few weeks ago to find out all the ins and outs of how Predators was shot. While we were there, all the Spy Kids 4 evidence had to be removed so that we wouldn’t see anything we shouldn’t. I think other than the title of the movie being shown on some of the cars coming into the studio, that was about it but here we have our first look photos from the shoot to prove it is indeed in full swing.

Spy Kids 4 is written and directed by Robert Rodriguez and it’s cast includes Jessica Alba, Joel McHale, Sadie Brook, Roger Edwards, Adam Moroz, Alcides Dias, Danny Trejo, Antonio and Banderas.

It’s set for release in the UK 19th August 2011.

Check out the image below and click here to view a few more.