The decision to step into the world of New Kids Nitro was one that was made literally at the last possible second. Originally, I was content to spend my witching hour with Kim Ji-Woon’s new sprawling apocalyptic guessing game, Doomsday Book. However while en route, I was assured that unless I was truly looking for a 120+ minute Chinese film that moved almost as fast as a turtle in full sprint, I would perhaps be better off spending my time with a group of rowdy Dutch folk! In hindsight, I’m not sure I have ever made a more deft decision in my entire festival career.
Now this is generally the part of the review where I go on some long tangent trying to explain the film’s plot to readers who, more than likely, know nothing about this film. Well, that would be all fine and dandy, were the film to actually contain some semblance of a coherent storyline. Instead what exists are a large collective of some of the most obscenely offensive happenings that a few Dutchmen could conceive, all strung loosely together by the idea the that the Netherlands are possibly just one giant smoldering tea kettle where town rivalries are concerned. But the real question still remains; can a string of seemingly random and vulgar occurrences really hold a crowd’s attention for under 75 minutes, and actually stay funny? The answer is an overwhelming yes.
New Kids Nitro is a lot like those nasty conversations many of us have when around both friends, and a little too much alcohol. The ones that if held in public, would drive you to perform a few over the shoulder checks every once in a while. They’re those behind closed doors jokes, and we all have them, except now they’re up on screen for all of us to see. At times perhaps New Kid’s ever growing barrage of dead children, people getting hit by cars, and pregnant alcoholics may make us feel a little bad for laughing.. but only a little.
If you’re the type of person that finds dark borderless comedy to be instantly appealing, then you’re going to absolutely adore this film. It’s got just about anything to keep up with even the most unique senses of humor, and with a fair number of big guns, fast cars, high dollar explosions, and even some zombies to boot. It’s kind of like a Michael Bay film except it’s meant to be hilariously awful. If these kind of things turn out to not be your bag, then I recommend you avoid this movie at all costs.
Like many of you out there, I was until now completely unaware of both the film and TV show that preceded Nitro, so I can’t really speak to how well it plays in that regard. What I can tell you, is that film’s like this, along side of other native film’s screening here this year like Back Out, are all proof that we have to stop sleeping on this new wave of Dutch filmmakers, and start paying attention.
If you really want to know if this film is for you, just watch the trailer below (maybe don’t let your kids watch?):